Wednesday, October 26, 2011

This is my story and I'm sticking to it!

Hebrews:1 "Long ago God spoke many times and in many ways to our ancestors through the prophets. 2 And now in these final days, he has spoken to us through his Son. God promised everything to the Son as an inheritance, and through the Son he created the universe."

I'm EXTREMELY happy to announce that today was the first good day I've had in a long time! I finally confessed to the hubby that I think this (stress/depression/anxiety) is a very serious issue and he prayed over me and I asked him to remember to pray for me during the day while he's at work. I also talked to some ladies from our church last night and I'm sure some of them were praying for me today too. Have you ever felt like someone was praying for you and God was reaching down and giving you peace, or comfort or whatever you need in that moment?? It's an amazing feeling and I have really felt peace today. Not stress like I usually feel (almost every moment of the day). I can't say I have felt stressed at all today. Sure, there have been instances that didn't go the way I wanted but I didn't let it ruin my day. There have even been instances that Matthew and I have really bonded.

Thank you God for surrounding me with your presence and peace today! I love you!

Monday, October 24, 2011

Stress

Well the stresses of having kids, or really having a 3 year old, is really catching up to me. Something I haven't thought about till now is how all this stress is affecting the baby growing inside me. That is my real motivator for trying to have more patience. I'm sure part of the stress is not being able to keep up with cleaning the house. I feel guilty about it, and I really don't enjoy having it messy. I wrote out a time to clean every day, depending on what we have going on, but I haven't been good at looking at it. When I have free time cleaning is that last thing I want to do. I know it makes me feel better so I just have to force myself to do it. Am I the only one that has a hard time keeping a clean house?

Another thing I have to be better at is reading in my Bible and praying. I know it would help my morning to go better if I could just peel myself out of bed a little early. I'm really not a morning person so this is hard to do. I occasionally am good at reading and praying in the afternoon when the kids are napping but I've already lost my patience and had a negative attitude all morning. Maybe I also need to only focus on the positives and humor in life instead of always complaining. Which I must add that I've NEVER been a complainer. If I complain about something, I've probably already forgot an hour later what it was about.

There are also stresses with my family. Mostly with my older sister and sometimes with my little sister. My brother is really the only one without issues, haha. I think I could also use a weekend getaway with Shaun. I think we will try over Thanksgiving break when he'll be off of teaching. To be honest, I've been sleeping well though. I fall asleep on the couch around 10 give or take go up to bed around 10:30 or 11 and usually I get up around 6:45 or 7 to get ready for the kids coming over that I babysit. That's 8 hours give or take. I think my body would prefer 9 hours but 8 is pretty average for what they say the adult body needs.

Anyways, I'll try to make the next blog more positive. I just had to get that all out of my system.
Hope you all are doing well! :)

Monday, October 10, 2011

ooops!

Wow, it has been a while, hasn't it?! I've been super busy with the boys, getting over a cold, watching kids almost everyday at our house, enjoying time with family. Did I mention we are expecting baby #3 around May 4th?!?! Yup, it's true. Wil and baby#3 will be 18 months apart which is my minimum for being sane. Anything less than that and I would be stressing out! We are planning on this being my last pregnancy and we would like to adopt when our kids are older. Maybe when Matthew turns 13, baby#3 will be 9. We think we will adopt a toddler. I like the 3 year old age even though its difficult, they say the funniest things and toddlers aren't adopted as much as babies. Anyways, on a personal note I'm very torn about what to do to prevent getting pregnant again. I obviously get pregnant pretty easily. Any suggestions? I have my opinions but didn't want to go too personal and turn you all away from reading my blog ever again :) Maybe I'll open up if anyone else has input.

I've really been enjoying the boys lately. Its really funny how Matthew likes soccer and karate even though my husband and I have never been into those sports. We drove past a soccer game yesterday and Matthew was shouting "SOCCER!". First of all it was impressive to us that he knew that's what they were playing and second of all it's pretty interesting that he is so into it when we have never talked about it or watched it. My hubby is into football, basketball, baseball and tennis, and I would like our boys to be into any of those (no more than 2 sports - don't want to overwhelm them). If I had to pick a sport for our boys to play that neither me or Shaun were into, I think I would pick hockey. I don't know why, I just see it as still being a 'manly' sport with potential of being successful. I don't think it's too dangerous, is it!?
Wil has been fun to watch now that he is almost one. His personality is really coming out, in good ways and bad ways. Today I noticed if he doesn't get what he wants he throws himself on the floor. The tantrums are being already. But he is a lot of fun too. He has this cheesy smile he does which just makes me crack up! And he loves to be tickled and is climbing on everything. I just love him to pieces. Matthew has been harder to love lately. He has really been a brat lately and is always trying to wrestle with me. Sometimes I would just like my space, especially with being pregnant again, I don't want him jumping on me and when I was going through my nauseous phase I didn't even want him sitting on my lap. He is just so loud too, and always shouting commands at me. Like at this exact moment he is demanding "drink, momma!" He always asks me for things as soon as I sit down. He sure is a lot of work, but a lot of fun too. He says the funniest things and I love when he want to cuddle with me. I love when he kisses his brother and shares things with him and I sure do wish I had his energy!
Anyways, just wanted to catch everyone up on what's going on since I know it was a while. Hope you all are doing well!